Two days following Halloween, my boys wake up and are still so eager to run downstairs and count the delicious, sugar-filled pieces of their Halloween agglomeration. This morning something very profound struck my heart. My littlest boy, Ben, was counting his candy. Both boys had received several gummy eyeballs. Benjamin had already devoured his and was staring, longingly, at Noah's uneaten bodily remains. The thought that crossed my mind was that I would be removing a little candy caper from our living room, but I was caught off guard by what happened. Benjamin wrapped his sweet, soft little boy hands around his candy pile and with as much love in his heart as he could muster he pushed the entire pile over to Noah. "Here Noah." He said. "I'd like to give you all the pieces of my candy."
It's not just the words, but it's how he said it. There was no joking reference, no sarcasm, no disdain. It was whole-hearted, authentic generosity. Something that, as many mothers know, can be a pretty extraordinary emotion in a 3 year old boy. My heart blew up with elation as Benjamin made his offering to his big brother. Then, within the same heartbeat, my jaw dropped to the floor as Noah grappled at the candy pieces and pulled them out of Ben's hands without so much as a thank you. To make matters worse, Benjamin then tried to retrieve one piece of the candy for himself and Noah immediately grabbed it out of his hand claiming his right to ownership. That was the straw that broke the camel's back. Mama Bears need to protect their cubs, even from each other. I hope my roar didn't come out audibly as loud as it was in my heart.
Needless to say, Noah got a lesson in thankfulness this morning. I'm not a big fan of those touchy-feely, Full House lectures. Mr. Tanner sits down with Stephanie and DJ while soft, nurturing music fills the background...not really my style. But, how does one teach thankfulness?? We should embody this quality year round, but during the season of Thanksgiving, isn't it the perfect time to highlight this lesson and try to teach our little ones to hold it in their hearts?
This world can be so ungrateful, full of entitlement and greed. As dismal a portrait as I just painted, there is another side to the coin. There are people who give, adamantly and whole-heartedly, just like my Benjamin. How do we teach our children to do the same? Just as important, how do we teach our children to have hearts full of thankfulness and joy!? I think it's important for us to call our children out when they are demonstrating poor qualities of the heart and not just let it slide by, labeling it as a "phase" or making the excuse that they don't understand their actions. It goes beyond teaching manners. Lessons of the heart strike much deeper. I want this world to be a better place when my children grow up. I want there to be more love and less hate, more giving and less taking, more God and less "people pleasing". This time of Thanksgiving should be just that. I'd like to work on my heart this season to think less of myself and to be joyful and grateful for all that I have and have been given. I'm going to bring my children into this celebration! I'm going teach them how to be grateful, by first reminding myself how to be grateful.
There's an old lesson about a plane going down. When the oxygen masks drop, you place one on yourself first, so you are fully capable of assisting those around you. I think we need to work on our own hearts. Our children will see that, as they tend to see EVERYTHING... even the crud. This Thanksgiving season, I pray for all of us that our hearts will be filled with the good stuff. Let's not just BE grateful, let's ACT grateful. The lessons begin small with Halloween candy. It's this mom's hope that when the lessons get big, my children will carry thankfulness in their hearts and no act of kindness will go unrecognized. Big or small.
Friday, November 2, 2012
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
The Savvy Fiduciary
COUPON CLIPPERS UNITE! How in the world does one thrive in a one-income family this day and age?! I'm on a quest to find the perfect part time job that will work around a full time mom's schedule, be flexible enough that a puking or sniffling child is a good enough reason for my absence, and will give the body of my family's financial livelihood a little pecuniary splurge.
We're all on a budget, times are tough. Until that perfect employment opportunity comes along, we will have to rely on my scathingly brilliant schemes of economic expansion. I've been compiling a list of economically friendly tips to help trim some "fat" from our budget belly. Take a look:
1. Cut down on fast food or treats. Mama loves her greasy Baconator... what can I say?
2. Trim your shower time by a mere 2 minutes. According to the back of my Suave body wash bottle, this may save up to $150 a year and close to 4,600 gallons of water! According to my husband, my showers are so long, he should keep his shower the same and I should cut mine down by 4 minutes. Motion denied.
3. Plan family meals based on the adds at the market. It's not so much "eat what you're hungry for", it's more or less "Be hungry for what you can eat".
4. Buy in bulk when you find it economically advantageous. I bought a 10 pound tube of hamburger from the market last month because it was far more reasonable in the long run than buying the 2 pounds I needed. Aside from the financial perks, this tube 'o beef would be a stellar weapon to use on burglars, Kirby salesmen, and those pesky door to door politicians.
5. Shut the lights off! If anyone has ever driven by and witnessed us dining by candlelight, it's not a romantic gesture.
6. Rent movies from your local library. True, halfway through most of them the DVD begins to skip and you have to turn off your TV, completely unsatisfied. If you're specifically keen to the mystery genre, this may not bother you too much.
7. Shop second hand stores, especially for kids clothing. It takes approximately 2 wears before Noah's jeans have holes in the knees. This is the kid who can wear a hole through a pair of sweatpants! Ridiculous...
8. Conserve your gasoline! Stop driving so much. Plan one trip for multiple purposes. Or, just walk... But walk slowly, or you may break a sweat. Then you would need an additional shower, thus proving this bullet point to be extremely counter-productive.
9. Turn your heat down. When my brother and I were kids, if we told Dad we were cold, he would tell us to go put on another sweatshirt. Who needs heat nowadays when we have the technology of the Snuggie!
10. And finally, my last tip for economic expansion: hang dry your clothes. According to one study, your clothes dryer is the second largest energy consuming appliances in your home, using up to 4000 watts per operation! We have a clothesline outside for the warmer months and one inside for the winter months. It looks a bit tacky on laundry day, but it puts great moisture back in the air that is lost during those dry, winter days.
Now, I'm no expert. I'm just trying to be a resourceful, savvy fiduciary. I invite you to comment at the bottom of my blog and share some of your creative ways to make the dollar stretch!
We're all on a budget, times are tough. Until that perfect employment opportunity comes along, we will have to rely on my scathingly brilliant schemes of economic expansion. I've been compiling a list of economically friendly tips to help trim some "fat" from our budget belly. Take a look:
1. Cut down on fast food or treats. Mama loves her greasy Baconator... what can I say?
2. Trim your shower time by a mere 2 minutes. According to the back of my Suave body wash bottle, this may save up to $150 a year and close to 4,600 gallons of water! According to my husband, my showers are so long, he should keep his shower the same and I should cut mine down by 4 minutes. Motion denied.
3. Plan family meals based on the adds at the market. It's not so much "eat what you're hungry for", it's more or less "Be hungry for what you can eat".
4. Buy in bulk when you find it economically advantageous. I bought a 10 pound tube of hamburger from the market last month because it was far more reasonable in the long run than buying the 2 pounds I needed. Aside from the financial perks, this tube 'o beef would be a stellar weapon to use on burglars, Kirby salesmen, and those pesky door to door politicians.
5. Shut the lights off! If anyone has ever driven by and witnessed us dining by candlelight, it's not a romantic gesture.
6. Rent movies from your local library. True, halfway through most of them the DVD begins to skip and you have to turn off your TV, completely unsatisfied. If you're specifically keen to the mystery genre, this may not bother you too much.
7. Shop second hand stores, especially for kids clothing. It takes approximately 2 wears before Noah's jeans have holes in the knees. This is the kid who can wear a hole through a pair of sweatpants! Ridiculous...
8. Conserve your gasoline! Stop driving so much. Plan one trip for multiple purposes. Or, just walk... But walk slowly, or you may break a sweat. Then you would need an additional shower, thus proving this bullet point to be extremely counter-productive.
9. Turn your heat down. When my brother and I were kids, if we told Dad we were cold, he would tell us to go put on another sweatshirt. Who needs heat nowadays when we have the technology of the Snuggie!
10. And finally, my last tip for economic expansion: hang dry your clothes. According to one study, your clothes dryer is the second largest energy consuming appliances in your home, using up to 4000 watts per operation! We have a clothesline outside for the warmer months and one inside for the winter months. It looks a bit tacky on laundry day, but it puts great moisture back in the air that is lost during those dry, winter days.
Now, I'm no expert. I'm just trying to be a resourceful, savvy fiduciary. I invite you to comment at the bottom of my blog and share some of your creative ways to make the dollar stretch!
Monday, October 22, 2012
"Rocking" our Babies
In the world of sacrifice, there are very few occupations in the world that cause someone to give more of themselves than motherhood. The love, the time, the dedication. What a mother will give up for her children is endless. I would lay down my own life for my sweet babies.
HOWEVER, I will not, I shall not, I shan't give up my right to ROCK! Yes, I will admit the CD player in my ruby-red minivan is indeed filled with Veggie Tales, Mary Poppins and Sunday School Classics. After all, there is a time and place for everything. Nevertheless, when you see us cruisin' down the road, heads a bobbin', spankin' that air bass, I can guarantee you, Julie Andrews is not the cause of the commotion. My boys know more Switchfoot and Toby Mac lyrics than most grown men! I don't shelter them from their crazy Mom's abilities to jam. I figure they'll either hate it about me or love it about me. I think at this point in their lives, I'm still riding the wave of cool and they have not yet realized my potential to embarrass them. Noah has even asked if he and I could go to a rock concert together someday. Every mother's dream!
I've traded in my purse for a luxurious Menard's Backpack on rebate with padded shoulder straps. I've given up my SUV for the convenience and space accommodations of a minivan. I've said goodbye to Victoria's Secret and hello to affordable, conservative cotton 6 packs from the dollar store. There are very few ways in which I can sink any further into this Mom-gig. But, true to my soul, to the depths of my heart, I will rock until the day I die. Probably wearing a cozy pair of Mom jeans.
Check out my favorite band and give them a listen -
http://www.switchfoot.com/
HOWEVER, I will not, I shall not, I shan't give up my right to ROCK! Yes, I will admit the CD player in my ruby-red minivan is indeed filled with Veggie Tales, Mary Poppins and Sunday School Classics. After all, there is a time and place for everything. Nevertheless, when you see us cruisin' down the road, heads a bobbin', spankin' that air bass, I can guarantee you, Julie Andrews is not the cause of the commotion. My boys know more Switchfoot and Toby Mac lyrics than most grown men! I don't shelter them from their crazy Mom's abilities to jam. I figure they'll either hate it about me or love it about me. I think at this point in their lives, I'm still riding the wave of cool and they have not yet realized my potential to embarrass them. Noah has even asked if he and I could go to a rock concert together someday. Every mother's dream!
I've traded in my purse for a luxurious Menard's Backpack on rebate with padded shoulder straps. I've given up my SUV for the convenience and space accommodations of a minivan. I've said goodbye to Victoria's Secret and hello to affordable, conservative cotton 6 packs from the dollar store. There are very few ways in which I can sink any further into this Mom-gig. But, true to my soul, to the depths of my heart, I will rock until the day I die. Probably wearing a cozy pair of Mom jeans.
Check out my favorite band and give them a listen -
http://www.switchfoot.com/
Thursday, October 18, 2012
Baking With Children
Baking with a child. Need I say anything more to bring images of flour-covered kitchen walls and crunchy, egg shell-laden baked goods to the front of your mind!? One bit of advice I always give after making a masterpiece with my children: "chew carefully". When I was little, I remember diving into culinary projects with my mom, plastering my face to the oven door to watch the delicious chocolate morsels melting into the golden brown masses of sticky, gooey goodness. A thought has crossed my mind, now that I am the mom in the generation. Did my mom have a hard time parting with the beaters? It's like a torch passing ceremony when we can no longer lick our own beaters, because some little nose picking, sticky fingered progeny has planted their little flag in our mixing bowl, like Columbus discovering the New World! I wont spoil their enthusiasm by telling them that I've already been there and done that!
In all honesty, I am happy to make the sacrifice. To me, there's nothing better than being in the kitchen on a cold day, the tunes of an old crooner coming from the stereo, delicious smells coming from the oven. The little voices, asking if they can add the baking soda, just make that experience so much more meaningful, and so much warmer, not to mention entertaining! Especially with some of my favorite holidays quickly approaching, in my family, the kitchen has always been a place for gathering, a place for laughter, and a place to stuff your face with as much unhealthy food as possible!
All chaos aside, baking with children is a bit of a legacy. I have it flowing through my veins thanks to my Mom, and now, hopefully, my children will have the same inclination toward the kitchen because of these messy, wonderful moments together. Just mother, offspring, and mixing bowl. A little love goes a long way!
In all honesty, I am happy to make the sacrifice. To me, there's nothing better than being in the kitchen on a cold day, the tunes of an old crooner coming from the stereo, delicious smells coming from the oven. The little voices, asking if they can add the baking soda, just make that experience so much more meaningful, and so much warmer, not to mention entertaining! Especially with some of my favorite holidays quickly approaching, in my family, the kitchen has always been a place for gathering, a place for laughter, and a place to stuff your face with as much unhealthy food as possible! All chaos aside, baking with children is a bit of a legacy. I have it flowing through my veins thanks to my Mom, and now, hopefully, my children will have the same inclination toward the kitchen because of these messy, wonderful moments together. Just mother, offspring, and mixing bowl. A little love goes a long way!
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
Ode To My Expectations
Do you remember being little? More specifically pertaining to myself, do you remember being a little nerd? Do you remember thinking to yourself, "Okay... so I don't really have it all going for me right now, but S O M E D A Y..." The dot. dot. dot. was the most important part of this thought. Within this dot. dot. dot. you could dream of whatever fulfilling, mind-boggling, self-centered expectation that would make you seem totally, 100%, authentically pure awesome. Those thoughts comforted this young nerd as I struggled through finding my place in the crazy jungle of growing up. I, consciously and subconsciously put thousands of expectations on myself that made "grown up Meg" seem ridiculously successful, wealthy, popular, and by all means, drop dead GORGEOUS!
As I lounge here in my over sized sweats, hair pulled back, no makeup, remnants of my three children stuck all over myself, i realize that all those expectations can really build a girl up for feeling like a total failure. All of those plans we make as children, or even as young adults, just seem like a misleading first chapter in our autobiographies. We trick ourselves into thinking that we'll be happy if we could just. . . (there's that dot. dot. dot. again) We will be content if we could only have. . . We would really feel worthy if we accomplished. . . dot. dot. dot. Not all expectations are corrupt, but they can be a dangerous comfort in a realistic world of falling short and falling down.
At this most crucial and delicate phase in my life, I am learning to cut out those dots. With the precision of a well-seasoned surgeon, I am expunging those unhealthy expectations right out of my mind and replacing them with something of far more value. Something that will bring me more wealth, happiness and contentment than I ever thought possible. The simple element of JOY!
I have a tremendously amazing husband. Far more intelligent, attractive, and skilled in the art of fly fishing than I ever dreamed possible, he fathers our children with such fervor, he knows how to grill, fix stuff and he's not afraid of dish soap. We have so many joys within our marriage, I want to roll around in them like my 3 and 5 year old boys do to a pile of leaves. Despite our conflicts, differences and failures, there is JOY!
I have 3 beautiful children, 2 boys, Noah (freshly 5) and Benjamin (almost 3). And my sweet baby girl Lillian (10 months). The days are filled with boogers and crumbs and poopy and tantrums and stubborn, defiant battles of the wills. But there is so much JOY! The laughter, the giggles, the silliness, the accomplishments, big and small! The amazingly deep questions that provoke and antagonize the kid in me to remember simpler times.
My family has their health, my husband is gainfully employed, there is food in our bellies and clothes on our backs, the roof over our head, although rented and small, is there and it keeps the rain out. Joy! The details of my life are not exactly as I imagined they would be when I was planning my adulthood years ago. The disappointments have come, done their damage and left their scars. But I am ready to be joyful. I am ready to live the life that I have been given and be grateful for the blessings God has showered over me. I have struggled through some dark spots and gotten lost a couple of times. But I am still joyful, and I am still smiling.
As I lounge here in my over sized sweats, hair pulled back, no makeup, remnants of my three children stuck all over myself, i realize that all those expectations can really build a girl up for feeling like a total failure. All of those plans we make as children, or even as young adults, just seem like a misleading first chapter in our autobiographies. We trick ourselves into thinking that we'll be happy if we could just. . . (there's that dot. dot. dot. again) We will be content if we could only have. . . We would really feel worthy if we accomplished. . . dot. dot. dot. Not all expectations are corrupt, but they can be a dangerous comfort in a realistic world of falling short and falling down.
At this most crucial and delicate phase in my life, I am learning to cut out those dots. With the precision of a well-seasoned surgeon, I am expunging those unhealthy expectations right out of my mind and replacing them with something of far more value. Something that will bring me more wealth, happiness and contentment than I ever thought possible. The simple element of JOY!
I have a tremendously amazing husband. Far more intelligent, attractive, and skilled in the art of fly fishing than I ever dreamed possible, he fathers our children with such fervor, he knows how to grill, fix stuff and he's not afraid of dish soap. We have so many joys within our marriage, I want to roll around in them like my 3 and 5 year old boys do to a pile of leaves. Despite our conflicts, differences and failures, there is JOY!
I have 3 beautiful children, 2 boys, Noah (freshly 5) and Benjamin (almost 3). And my sweet baby girl Lillian (10 months). The days are filled with boogers and crumbs and poopy and tantrums and stubborn, defiant battles of the wills. But there is so much JOY! The laughter, the giggles, the silliness, the accomplishments, big and small! The amazingly deep questions that provoke and antagonize the kid in me to remember simpler times.
My family has their health, my husband is gainfully employed, there is food in our bellies and clothes on our backs, the roof over our head, although rented and small, is there and it keeps the rain out. Joy! The details of my life are not exactly as I imagined they would be when I was planning my adulthood years ago. The disappointments have come, done their damage and left their scars. But I am ready to be joyful. I am ready to live the life that I have been given and be grateful for the blessings God has showered over me. I have struggled through some dark spots and gotten lost a couple of times. But I am still joyful, and I am still smiling.
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